Funny stuff for Friday afternoon...

I ran across this several years ago online, but just saw it again and had to post it...

Dear Reverend:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination. End of debate. I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some of the other specific laws and how to follow them:

When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15:19- 24. The problem is, how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.

Lev. 25:44 states that I may indeed possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighboring nations. A friend of mine believes this only applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own a Canadian?

Conversely, can I be sold into slavery in Mexico or Canada?

I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself?

Eating shellfish is an abomination - Lev. 11:10, but a friend of mine feels that it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this?

Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle room here?

Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev. 19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? - Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively, so I am confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your devoted fan...

Melancholy Sunday

Couch potato Sunday...that's what today is.  I was watching TV for a while...a BBC America broadcast about the Beatles and let's just say that those boys sure got around.

I turned everything off about an hour ago and have been sitting here on the computer for the last 15 minutes or so.  Looked up some YouTube videos and found some funny stuff.  I recently ran across Film Riot...look them up on YouTube.  They have some hysterical skits over there.  But, I was also looking up one of my former employers, Rex Nelon.  Found a lot of videos of their performances over the years.  Great to see some old familiar faces, but nostalgia swiftly turned to melancholy.  Rex passed away about 10 years ago and his daughter, Kelly, has kept the group going.  She's the only one remaining that I know.  They were recently in the area up at a church in Yuba City and I seriously contemplated going, but didn't get the nerve up to go.  A lot of water has passed under that bridge...I also spoke to my mom last night and some old acquaintances are performing at my home church today.  Really makes me miss my touring days and some dear old friends.  It's just different now.

When I left Rex in 1985, I didn't look back.  The truth is...I was fired from Rex's band because he found out that I had been visiting gay bars.  It was an ugly and difficult time for me, but he was very gracious about it.  And it forced me to confront the truth about myself, so it is all good.  God has certainly bless me over the years and I found another outlet to perform in theater for a while.  But, it seems that my life has taken a new turn lately (the past three years) in that I just seem to be focusing on financial issues and trying to plan for my retirement.  James and I are trying to take steps now to secure our financial future...more planning and budgeting...but I am seriously coming down with a case of theater withdrawals.  More than anything, I need some kind of creative outlet.

Speaking of which, the webseries is in progress.  It's been delayed a bit, but I haven't stopped writing episodes or music for it.  So, stay tuned.  The editing is the hard part since I'm playing 4 different roles.

I realize I'm not saying anything specific in this post...I just had the urge to write some stuff down.  My job is going very well...the real estate side gig is a little slow at the moment.  I'm hoping that picks up soon.

My BFF Anne-Marie Trout has adopted a new puppy and as soon as she recovers from being spayed, I am taking Willow over for a play date.

I also decided to try and fix some broken springs on my couch.  It actually worked pretty well, but my hands are all scratched up from the sharp metal where the springs had broken.  I fixed a couple of them, but I need to finish it up.

If you're not a fan, then you won't understand why I'm so unhappy with RuPaul's Drag Race.  My favorite queen, Pandora Boxx, was eliminated two episodes ago.  The remaining three, (Juju, Tyra and Raven) have one more episode to go.  Of those, Juju is my favorite.  Raven would be my second choice.  And Tyra just has much too bitchy a personality.  Pandora was the most talented of all of the queens this year.  She was very funny and seemed to have a lot more to offer than being a lip-synch artist.  Guess RuPaul was going for something else.

Okay...yes, a very boring post today, but it feels good to write again.  Need to find more time for it.  Any way...have a great day!!  Blessings and light to you all!

Ray

April showers bring May allergies...

Or something to that effect...I'm loving the on and off rain we're having this year.  It's making for an incredibly green spring, but we're also having high pollen counts here in the valley.  My allergies are kicking my butt!  But, I think it's worth it this year.

Life has been good, but full of challenges the past month.  First of all, I must share a little Ode to Odie.  On March 11th, James and I had to take our little guy into the vet due to respiratory distress.  There was nothing left we could do, so I stayed and held him while the vet put him down.  It broke my heart and still brings tears to my eyes when I think about it.  It was almost two years to the day after we had to do the same thing to our Lucy.  But, he's been to visit me a couple of times over the last few weeks.  I know it was the right thing and I'm glad he's not suffering any longer.

So, I also know that I'm late updating you guys on our web series.  I've been waiting on my partner in crime, Anne-Marie Trout, to finish up a couple of shows.  Well, she closed last weekend so things are starting up again.  I uploaded a song I may use in the project to YouTube last night.  I'm including the link here...but I wrote the song originally about 8 years ago for a musical I was working on.  It was for a character who was a very strict evangelical father to sing after he had driven his entire family away.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TsZ2L6Xkd7o

Take a gander if you'd like...would love to get some feedback from people on it.  Especially if you know anything about arranging, or mixing/equalization.  I'm making a lot of this stuff up as I go!

Hope you have a blessed day!!

March Madness!

Wow...it's been a big ole pile of hectic, crazy, madness around the Brave-Fisher household the last couple of months.  I don't even know where to start.

I guess the biggest thing is that James' dad, Brad, passed away three weeks ago.  James is very close to his dad and this has been a difficult time for him.  We really appreciate your thoughts and prayers for him and his family.  It's been even more difficult because James is on workmans' comp from his job and hasn't worked in 2 weeks now.  He has a work-related injury to his arm and we're waiting for the doctor to clear him to go back.  So, he's been stuck at home alone with no normal routine to take his mind off things.

I went away on business to Reynosa, Mexico and Dallas, Texas for a week.  My boss and I were traveling together and it was a great trip; but, the timing was bad as it was the week after James' father passed.  It was unusual to have to get a work permit across the Mexican border to attend business meetings there...but I have to admit:  My boss is fun to travel with.  We had some great dinners and shared a lot of beers together.  Fun times!

Great doctor's visit in mid-February.  My blood work came back and my diabetes is well under control.  My A1C was 7.3 which is almost normal...it's down from 11.8 back in October.  My cholesterol was also way down from 254 to 132.  The only bad thing was my blood pressure was up...though, I was feeling pretty crappy that day.  But overall, everything was very positive on that visit.

James gave me a Wii for Christmas and I have been addicted ever since.  I play Wii tennis everyday for at least an hour.  It gets me off the couch and moving which has helped me lose 18 pounds.  I need some new games, so please let me know if you have one to recommend that you think I might enjoy.

I think I have found a new church to attend.  You folks who know me understand how important my spiritual development has become over the past few years.  Though I was raised Christian, my beliefs have evolved over the years dramatically...and I'm hoping this church in Auburn will help me find the path I'm looking for.  I think it has...my weekend in Santa Monica last October has given me a new outlook and I've met quite a few new friends with similar beliefs.

Of course, it seems everyone keeps pushing me to get back to my Christian upbringing.  Sorry, folks...though I respect everyone's beliefs, I just do not believe the Bible is the word of God.  It may have been inspired by God, but it's been basterdized over the years by pious hypocrites seeking to use it to usurp power and control over peoples' lives; and the message has been polluted by political and religious dogma that has nothing to do with God.  I don't believe in hell, but if I did...I'm certain that "Christians" like Jerry Falwell, Maggie Gallagher, and Fred Phelps will be burning in it for the pain and suffering they've caused millions of people.

So, I choose to believe that God loves us all and no one has a copyright on truth.  I don't have to look outside of myself to find God...God lives in my heart.  I don't have to look to a 2,000 year old book to find Him...because it was written by human beings no better or worse than me.  And I can have a connection just as meaningful and powerful as they had with the creator...I don't have to find a preacher or a guru who offers to be the connection to God for me and communicate to me what God's message is for my life.  I need a spiritual teacher who will help me make that connection on my own...totally eliminating the middle man and any translations that have to go through another human filter to get to me.  I know a lot of people will look at this and say it's a very egotistic viewpoint...I disagree.  It's an empowering belief...but still a humbling one to go directly before God and realize just how small I am in comparison; yet also how powerful because I am one of His children and therefore have a spark of the Divine in my heart.

After spending so many years in the Christian faith, I have simply found that most churches and preachers don't really know anything about God...they only know about telling others what to do.  It's all about power and money...and mostly about separation.  Separation from God because human beings are inherently sinful and therefore not even worthy of His love...and separation from others who don't believe the same because those people are evil and will not spend eternity in the kingdom.  None of it makes sense to me...especially that human beings can be condemned to burn for all eternity in hell for the sins of one lifetime by a loving and compassionate God?  No thanks...you can keep that belief.  It does not make sense to me.

I do believe in the divinity of Christ...though, I'm honestly not sure about this "dying for our sins" thing.  I have a hard time understanding why an all-knowing and all-powerful God requires a blood sacrifice for any reason.  In the old testament, He required an animal sacrifice...in the new testament, He required a human sacrifice.  It bugs me...along with a lot of other things I won't go into about the murder of children to free Israel from Egypt and when Joshua fought the battle at Jericho.  Oh...I guess I went into them.

See?  Religion does strange things to people...the worst thing I've found is how judgemental it makes us.  We constantly compare other people's actions and beliefs to our religious canon and make judgement calls on whether those people are worthy of our association or approval as a result.  Some religions even require that people who don't stand up to those comparisons be rejected, excommunicated, or even killed as a result.  That's a loving and compassionate religion for you!

I didn't mean to go on that tangent this morning.  Just something that's been on my mind lately...but it's too serious of a subject for a Friday!

James is heading out of town this weekend and I plan to spend some time with my dear friends, Andrea St. Clair and Jessica Larrick.  I'm cooking lasagna and having them over for drinks and movies on Saturday.

So, I'm sending lots of love and positive energies out to each of you today.  Remember that I love and appreciate each of you...without conditions or judgements.  Be blessed and be good to one another!